site related
Special features
RSS Feed
about 8bm
favorite sites
for old stories.

Some assembly required

In 1920 the Russian transplant pioneer Serge Voronoff made headlines by grafting monkey testicles onto human males.

Dr. Serge Voronoff (1866-1951), Russian physician in Paris, with aid.Fact: Back in 1920, the Russian transplant pioneer Serge Voronoff made headlines by grafting monkey testicles onto human males.

What I took from this: I think I just discovered the Godfather of Nazi science. I thought only a Nazi would graft monkey nuts on someone. That's pretty disturbing to say the least. Not so much that people were walking around barefoot in a lab with a pair of Gorilla nuts hanging down to their knees but that the "mad scientist" cliché we all know so well from schlock sci-fi was actually art imitating life.

Fact: You are most likely to lose your hearing than any of the other senses if you are hit by lightning.

Another Fact: 60% of electrocutions occur while talking on the phone during a thunderstorm.
What I took from this: It only makes sense.

Fact: The IRS employees' tax manual has instructions for collecting taxes after a nuclear war.

What I Took From This: I swear I will never make fun of Libertarians, low flying black helicopters, chem.-trails or paranoid right winged psycho-militia every again.
Anyone that is going to try to collect taxes from me even in the event of a nuclear holocaust has not only met but exceeded every criterion for evil that I can think of.

Fact: The same percentage of the American population that has internet access is the same percentage of native Africans that have AIDS.

What I Took From This: If there is a more fucked up statistic than this I don't want to hear it. Everyone I know has internet access.

Fact: In New Mexico, over eleven thousand people have visited a tortilla chip that appeared to have the face of Jesus Christ burned into it.

What I Took From This: Can someone please just give me one reason, just one fucking reason why Jesus would want to send humanity a sign by placing his face on a Doritio?

same difference

Pope Paul II (1467-71) died while being sodomized by a page boy.
Joining the priesthood to serve God is like trying to find hidden messages in a Beatle Song. I am sure you can do it, but that wasn't what it was intended for.

30% of Americans refuse to sit on a public toilet seat.
70% of Americans find peculiar rashes and spots of discoloration on their asses and genitals from time to time.