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half of American men admit to having sex with women they disliked.
If it wasn't for beer humans would have a mating season just like every other animal on the planet. Then we would just go our separate ways.
Moroccan surgeons deliver 46-year-old fetus
How could you be a doctor and not eventually become a hypochondriac. Statistically speaking, if anyone is going to get some shit, it should be you.
Woman survives 34 hours submerged in a bog
Personally, I have this thing about drowning. I have done everything in my power, throughout my life, to make sure that I don't drown, short of the obvious, learning how to swim.
Faith Healer Convicted of Sexual Abuse
To me, if you make a concerted effort not to look both ways when you cross the street, if you get run over by a bus it's automatically ineligible from being considered a tragic event.
Ohio Oks creationism in Science Class
Shouldn't they be teaching "intelligent design" theory in history instead? Wouldn't it fit better right along with the section "When we used to think the world was flat," and "When we used to think the sun revolved around the earth"?
Giuliani Hired To Try To Clean Up Mexico City's High Crime Rate
Comparing New York City and Mexico City is like comparing Anna Nicole Smith to that pig on "E" that ate Anna and is now calling herself Anna Nicole Smith.
High School Kid Dumps Older Big Tit Model
Getting angry at her for sucking off other men is like getting angry at a dog for barking. That is what dogs do, they bark, that is how they communicate. Sucking dick for a porn star is absolutely no different. It's how they communicate.
The Makers of Bum Fights Arrested - Thank God
Every generation without fail gets to the point where they look at the younger generation and say, "What the fuck is wrong with you bastards?!" This is my turn.  
Thousands flock to see a puddle shaped like Buddha's footprint guarded by frog
I'm not up on my "10 Things You Have To Know About Buddha" but what was so distinctive about his fucking feet? What? Was he a Sasquatch?
Buzz Aldrin Accused of Punching Moon Skeptic
Apparently there are two things you just don't do:
Never tell a professional wrestler that you think wrestling is fake and never ask an astronaut to swear on a bible that he didn't fake the moon landing.
Pope publicly apologizes for rampant pedophilia in catholic church
There is more dick being passed around in the Catholic church than there is at an Oscar party at Kevin Spacey's house.
duyba chokes on pretzel, falls off couch, doctors assure us this is normal
Let me get this straight. The man had a serious drinking problem?
You Can Take The Idiot Out Of The Ghetto But He Keeps Coming Back
Multi-millionaire rap artists are like the 21st century version of the Beverly Hillbillies. Nothing changed in Jed Clampett when he struck oil either. Nothing except his address.
horse kicks rapist in the face...ah karma you tricky bastard
Karmaic Truth is omnipresent we just refuse to recognize it.
Milosevic: I was just fighting terrorism
Mark my words. Every single conflict, bar none that you will see anywhere in the world for the remainder of your lifetime will be called a war against "terror"
Boy in Jesus Outfit Gets His Ass Kicked After "Little Bo Peep" Insult
That is a sad statement on the state of the world when you have to pull a bully off of Jesus. 
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