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muslim world
Like most Americans, we came into the awareness of Islam after 9-11. Up until that point I had figured out the difference between black Muslims and real Muslims, but I had concluded the Islam was just another monotheistic religion coming out of the same desert that birthed Zoroastrianism, Judaism, and Christianity. I looked at Islam from the perspective of, Zoroastrianism gave Judaism its base, Judaism gave Christianity its base and Islam came around and brought everyone else that slipped between the cracks into the fold. I liked the fact that in Islam the Koran was the word of God, as opposed to the Bible which was just inspired by God, and I also dug the fact that Islam used familiar characters from the Torah and the Bible in its mythology.
In fact, I had a pretty good feeling about Islam once I knew the difference between real Muslims and the black Muslims.
Black Muslims are a whole other thing in-and-of-itself.
Then after 9-11, I, like most Americans, got a crash course on Islamic fundamentalism. The trick then was to be able to distinguish what exactly was fundamentalist about Islam and what wasn’t.
That is the tricky part because both the fundamentalist as well as the moderates are going to be quoting the same book, the same verses, so the question is, where are these lines going to be drawn?
And what we found was that the lines were not drawn between who were our allies and who weren’t.
There isn’t a place on earth more Islamic fundamentalist than Saudi Arabia and they are our friends, then we found out that damn near every terrorist involved in 9-11 was from Saudi Arabia.
Some friends.
Suddenly every single quote in the Koran that you can find that could be even remotely construed to mean “kill kill kill kill kill” was replayed over and over on our television sets like that film footage of Ronald Reagan getting shot. I mean I saw every angry Muslim cleric in the world on television over the course of 6 weeks. Laughing and justifying 9-11 like Allah had finally answered the bell and came out fighting for their cause.
Then I looked for the most levelheaded Muslim religious leaders to come out to counter what I was hearing coming out of every one-eyed, crippled Islamic cleric that al-Jazeera could put a microphone in front of in the Ottoman Empire and they were nowhere to be found.
Then suddenly, stories about women getting acid tossed in their faces by jealous boyfriends and/or being forced to stand patiently in burning buildings until the more valuable little boys get out safely dominated the media. Religious police walking around in Saudi Arabia beating the shit out of women who dared to venture out of the house but weren’t covered up enough.
I was like, “what the fuck?”
The people want to see the sensational and Islam was giving all that we could handle. So what was the real Islam? What was the difference?
Man Feels Betrayed When He Discovers Wife Has Only One Tit. 
The Reason You Should Always Fuck A Women Before You Marry Her. A Few Times.
Man Hurls Wife Out Of Window Over A Piece of Chicken
Muslim Men Need To Explain This Shit
Saudi princess jailed. Could Receive 15 Years In Prison For Assaulting Slave.
15 years of her life getting turned out and branded by some of the roughest biggest butch dykes in the Florida penal system it might persuade some of those in the holy land to re-evaluate their position on Al-Qaeda dividends.
Jury finds Egyptian butcher guilty of Killing Kid and burying him in concrete
Now I think we know what really happened to his arm.
Muslim 'Purity Police' Beat Young Girls To Prevent Them from Leaving Burning School
I will take pride in being called "the Great Satan" if the opposite means that I am in the good graces of a God that would condone the inhumanity that I read about coming out of the middle-east all in the name of Allah.
Several Arab nations See Jewish Conspiracy in Pokemon
The only thing more common than a conspiracy theorist and marijuana is that somewhere, somehow there is a Jew behind every one of his conspiracies.
Muslim Men Are Getting Divorces Using Text Messaging on their cell phones
I can only imagine what the Taliban expect the Afghanistan people would do if they actually had a clue that it wasn't 680 A.D.
Islamic Man Found Innocent Of Killing His Cousin Because She Wasn't Submissive Enough
Methal Dayem's mother, sister and aunt criticized the judicial system and said Allah would punish Yezen Dayem and his supporters.
Electrocuted Man Rises From The Dead. Jesus Who?
For My Next Trick...
Taliban arrests 24 foreign relief workers for propagating Christianity
Organized religion is to social ills what cortisone is to a professional football player's dislocated shoulder. It doesn't do shit but make you feel good enough to play on Sunday.
Taliban Slaughters 100 Cows to Atone for Not destroying Statues Sooner.
What an ego trip.
61 Pakistani Women Slain In 'Honor Killings' The Part of Bin Laden's Letter he Left Out
And you think western women would want to trade their situation here in the states for that? Half of them don't even know how to fix a bowl of Fruit Loops anymore. Having a modern day western woman cook an edible meal would be like setting her up to fail.
Muslim Woman Sues To Wear Veil For License Photo
"I don't unveil ... because it would be disobeying my Lord," Well I guess "your Lord" wants your ugly ass to catch a bus. Take it up with him. NEXT!
280 african boys held in islamic brainwashing facility
He must've kept them in cages because there is something about prison and islam that just seems to make it all come together.
scratch the white house. 50 billion muslims plan to blow up newsweek
The Koran is basically a transcript. God even told them where to place the puncutation. Unfortunately it was in Aramaic.

egyptian lawyer to sue the world's jews for biblical 'plunder'
I don't know where the statues of limitation are in the Egyptian legal system but you would think we could all agree that B.C.E. would be a great place to start.

indonesia going after queers, witch doctors
How the hell do you rationalize someone doing less time for shrinking heads than giving head?
i think somewhere down the line some of us missed the point.
No where does it say in the Quran that he was also the most skillful with a timer and a stick of dynamite.

malaysian prime minister says jews rule the world. jews get pissed but curiously jews don't deny it.
How does that work? I want to rule the world too. Where do I apply? I like Tzimmes. That's a start isn't it?

eleven die after grasshoppers swarm, no it wasn't a punishment from God
Yes, there were grasshoppers. Yes people died. However it wasn't because they didn't pray hard enough or that the people that died were on God's short list of things to do that day. It was because the grasshoppers stunk really bad.for some mysterious reason.

even islam has its devil worshippers
Albeit a watered down version to the motherfuckers we have over here but Devil Worshippers nonetheless.
daughter raped by her brothers, then murdered by mother
How exactly is killing yourself going to erase the fact that you have two nasty incestuous raping older brothers?
earthquake in iran kills 20,000 Imam confused how allah missed NY
20,000 Americans die from an earthquake in New York City and there is an Imam in Syria on al-Jazeera within the hour saying that it was punishment from Allah.
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