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Backwards Africa
Don’t get me wrong, not all of Africa is backwards. It’s a pretty big continent.
But make no mistake about it, some of it is.
Sudan has been in a civil war since Ray Crock opened up his first McDonalds restaurant in 1957.
Why hasn’t someone won that one already? Who out there really thinks the outcome of this one is still undecided?
Northern Sudan looks as modern as you can get in Africa, while the predominantly Christian southern Sudan still looks like something out of land of the lost.
Living conditions in Southern Sudan are so horrible that southern Sudan has diseases that don’t exist anywhere else in the world.
I say give it up already. Join the collective. It’s got to be better than you’ve got now.
The really sad part is that some places in Africa are every bit as backwards as the media has portrayed it to be over the years with people eating each other, casting spells on one another and refusing to insist that tokens of progress like electricity and the written word are implemented in their country.
Now I know it hurts to hear that. It hurts me. Studying African American studies in college no one ever mentioned that there are rebels in Uganda that go around cannibalizing people to get their “power”.
Hell they do the same thing in Haiti too, but Haiti is about as close to the backwards parts of Africa as you can get in the western world so I am not surprised.
Idi Amin allegedly ate 40 oranges a day to keep up his sexual “power”.
Oh yeah did I mention the Africans obsession with having “powers”? Muti, a form of witchcraft practiced in Africa is all about power. Of course to get the magic to work you have to use human body parts in the potions and those parts have to be taken from the victim while they are alive to feel every excruciating second of you removing what you need. Potions can call for everything from eyelids, ears, fingers, toes, eyes and even sexual genitalia which unfortunately hold the most power.
I was taught that Idi Amin was actually misunderstood and that the west made him out to be worse than he actually was.
To this day I still am confused as to how that could possibly be? How can you make a man that rounded up all of the military leaders that did not support his coup, murder them, decapitate them and then position their severed heads around the presidential dining table, scolding them for not supporting him and then ate pieces of them out to be worse than he actually was? Is there some other way to look at that scenario that would filter out my western bias? If so, please tell me.
In Kenya they employ retards known as Cleansers to go and have unprotected sex with widows and single mothers to protect against having a bad harvest which in their heads is somehow related to one another and as a result of this practice in some places almost one third of all of the people in an entire village are infected with AIDS.
Some entire countries in Africa are looking at a complete economic and social collapse in their countries because proportionately, as many people on the continent of Africa have AIDS as people in the United States have access to the internet.
People can debate whether or not AIDS was created by the CIA to rid the world of Africans until their lips are blue, AIDS is not killing Africa, the African’s unwillingness to adapt is killing the African.
Vigilante Leader Charged in 'Witches' Murder
When the uncivilized world gets their own crime-fighting vigilante what you get I am afraid is a far cry from Batman.
Villagers Kill Witch Who Was Blamed In Child's Death
Whoever’s idea it was to bring the shotguns is the guy I want to hunt witches with.
If I ever see Africa it Will Be On Pay Per View
I Have Lost All Interests In Going To Africa.
School Children In Drunken Riot
Ritualistic Killers Have To Start Somewhere
Three Sentenced To Death For Child Sacrifice. And You Thought I made This Shit up? 
I Will Only See Africa On Pay-Per-View. A Very Weird Read.
Man Beats, Rapes Woman and Pulls Her Intestines out Her Ass with His Bare hands
This is evil ladies and gentlemen. Evil not like Nietzsche. This isn't about Superman, salve morality or nihilism. This is evil like in Emperor Palpatine and Samara Morgan.
3 Voodoo Murders to Hang for Politicians Ritualistic Murder
while he lay with his eyes closed they chopped his head of with an axe, skinned him, and then chopped his body into 18 pieces and buried them in a hole covered with cement.
School Children Regret Fucking with the Evil Spirits in the Tree
I could never be an exorcist by profession because what the fuck is stopping it from deciding to just follow me home?
South Africa Says HIV Doesn't Exist
250,000 HIV infected women give birth annually in South Africa.
Let's compare that to the US where 370 children were born HIV positive in 2000
Say What You Will About African Black Magic, But I Wouldn't If I Were You!
This is a Detroit Free Press Article That Was Too Fucked Up To Not Reprint
Lawless Uganda Here I Come 
You Couldn't Pay Me Enough Money.
Man Shot Dead As Bulletproof Magic Fails
A Ghanaian man was shot dead by a fellow villager while testing a magic spell designed to make him bulletproof.
Hysterical Man Breaks Into Kenya-Bound Jet Cockpit and Wrestles Away Controls
Passengers said that once the man was subdued and the plane was back under control, the pilot said over the speakers that ''a very nasty man just tried to kill us all.''
Woman Wants Divorce Because Fears Husband Big Dick is Going To Kill Her.
Her husband denied possessing an oversized horse cock and claimed that his wife is only saying this to ruin his image.
Ancestral Spirits Block a $500 Million Dam Plan in Uganda
To scare these kind of people you don't have to do much more than predict an eclipse. If one is going to be visible in Uganda within the next few months I would just hold off and save my money.
Drug Addicts Drink Liquefied Lizard Shit To Get High
Sometimes I go back and fourth as to whether the modern day African is ass backwards or resourceful as fuck. For the record this won't be one of those times.
Farmington Hills Family Gets Busted With Having African Slave!
Old Habits Die Hard I Guess
South African court sentences man to 1,620 years in jail for Fraud
The Savings and Loan scandal is the largest theft in the history of the world. When S&L owners who stole millions went to jail, their sentances were typically one-fifth that of the average bank robber
in parts of africa witches are to blame…for everything.
I am willing to bet there has never been a single case ever in America of a person waking up in the middle of the night to find a stranger walking around their house who came from 100 miles away via flying saucer to eat their child.
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